Bonding.....

Toby is thirteen and growing fast.  I'm all too aware that the days of hanging out with the old man will become fewer and fewer and farther in between as he gets older and starts to become more independent.  It sucks, but that's the way it has to be.  The chicks gotta start spreading their wings and preparing to leave the nest some time......

I have no idea where the time went....I could have sworn Karla just dropped him off for his first day of kindergarten just a few days ago.  Seemingly in no time at all he has grown to be just about at tall as his mother, his voice has gotten deeper, and that round, baby face has all but disappeared.  Wow......Where did the time go?

He's already starting to take an interest in girls; which will most certainly cut into the time the two of us spend together.  And when he get's his driver's license.....Well, that's it, man.

So I need to spend more time with him while I still can.  The great thing is we have a lot in common.  I see a lot of fishing trips in our future and, if he wants to bring a friend, that's okay.  Just knowing he's having a good time in enough for me.

The one thing that we definitely do not have in common is diving.  My first deep dive ended with me in the ER in Eureka Springs, Arkansas.  Being bull headed I tried again in Cozumel only to suffer a severe case of motion sickness on the rough and stormy ocean.  I finally got the hint and have since given up diving. Toby and the rest of my family can dive while I stay on the beach holding a drink in my hand with a little umbrella in it.

In the mean time we have done a father/son trade off of things we like to do.  I got to go first, so I got out the old horse shoes and took Toby out to the pits.

I love to pitch shoes.  I'm not very good at it, but there is something about pitching a shoe and hearing the clang it makes when it hit's the peg that's just music to my ears......Of course, more often than not, the shoe just lands with a dull "whump" into the dirt; and hopefully it's the dirt INSIDE the pit.

So now that you know I'm not that good at it, I just have to show off:

I may not ever throw two ringers in one turn again so I best brag while I can......I won that game by the way.....   :)

I know we had a good time when Toby asked for another game......and then another after that.  Life is good.

Now it was Toby's turn.  He grinned and said, "We are gonna play Black Ops."

"What?"

"You vs. Me on the X-Box."

"Oh, bloody Hell."

I love to play on the X-Box.  But the games I like to play are all single player.  Plus, I like the video games that have a good plot.  I'll set the game on 'easy' just so I can get through it fast enough to enjoy story.  I like to think of the video game I'm playing as an interactive movie.

What I don't like playing are games that pit me against someone else.  My reaction time sucks and I have a hard time remembering anything beyond the basic moves.  I know jump, run, hit, fire, duck....You know simple stuff.  Combination moves, or, any move dealing with more than one button is a losing effort.  While I'm getting my ass beat, I'm looking down at my controller trying to remember "X plus Y, plus RB."  By the time I figure it out, the person fighting me has already bludgeoned me into a bloody pulp and has moved on in search of new prey......Notice I didn't say easier.....As a form of opposition I don't get much easier.

This was going to be ugly.  Toby will pour through a game manual and work and work and work until he gets it right.  I look at an instruction manual for a video game no differently then I would look at a manual to assemble a grill......I chuck it over my shoulder and assume that I can figure it out along the way.  This logic may apply to a long of things, but not in regards to video games.  Especially when the person you're going up against happens to be a merciless little prick.

I don't even know what half the weapons we were fighting with were.....I just know I wasn't worth a crap using any of them.

The shotgun was by far my best weapon because I didn't really have to aim.....Point in a general direction and fire.  I can handle that.

The rest of the weapons had sights that I actually had to use to draw a bead on my target.  From that point on it was Toby vs. the incredible slow motion man.

It sucked.....I would see the enemy in front of me, pull up my scope, and immediately lose sight of him.  Where in the Hell did he go?  I would scan around and find my adversary; who is now standing right next to me with his survival knife out.....Slow Mo man goes down in a heap.

"Dammit.....This sucks."

It was bad enough to see Toby whizzing around and taking me out without even using his weapon.  Then from out of nowhere I got shredded by rapid fire from above.

"What in the Hell is that?'  I bellow.

"Air support"  Toby says calmly.

"What?!?  How come I don't get air support?"

"You haven't got enough kills."

"Dude, I haven't got any kills!!!!!!"  I'm starting to lose my grip.

What came next seemed to last an eternity.  With Toby's helicopter overhead, I did the dance step I not so affectionately dubbed the "Bloody two step".  It goes like this.....Take two steps, get shot to pieces.  Re-spawn, take two steps, get shot to pieces.

"Toby!!!! This sucks!!!  I can't do this anymore!!!"  (any one that knows me will read this comment and say, "Hmm..That sounds like a Tera tantrum)

A little side story on Tera.....She found a tactic that drives Toby up a wall --- button mashing.

I didn't know what button mashing was until I saw Toby and Tera playing Injustice, basically street fighter on steroids.

Tera's character is some overly huge, ugly looking being that I had never heard of.  Whoever he was, he was laying a serious beat down on the Batman, Toby's character.

Toby yells, "Tera, nobody like a button masher."

Tera, "What's a button masher?"

Toby spits out, "It's when you just hit a bunch of buttons......You don't even know what you're doing."

Tera giggles, "But I'm winning."

Adolescent rage is about to set in, "You're not winning.....You're cheating!!!!!"

And, of course, when Tera sees an opportunity to dig her claws into him, she takes full advantage, "Woo-Hoo!!!! Button Mash, Button Mash....Woo!"

Toby chucks his controller onto the couch and walks off in a huff, "I quit.....Nobody likes a button masher, Tera."

Tera makes a sign for victory and laughs, "I win!!!"

My Black Ops misery ended with a beautiful stat line --- Kills:  Toby 430, Dad 30 -  Deaths: Toby 30, Dad 128.  I was ready to throw the controller through the wall.

"Don't worry, Dad." Toby reassured, "I saved the best for last."

"Really.....What gruesome torture do you have lined up for me now?"

Toby smiles, "Zombies."

My eyes widen and I grin like an idiot....."Did you say zombies?"

"Yup...Survival mode.  See how many levels we can last."

I don't know where my sick fascination with zombies came from, but I just love zombie games.  I've watched The Walking Dead on Netflix and have a copy of The Brain Eaters Bible on my bedside table.....Yes, it's a sick fascination.

I love, love, love zombie games....I could be the worst player in the world and it wouldn't matter.  And in this game I was a special kind of terrible.  If a zombie knocked you to the ground your ally could revive you.  I think Toby spent half the game reviving me.  But it was a blast.

Toby was wise to set up his father/son Xbox day this way.......All ended well as we both left his room happy.

So what's next on the agenda?  I have no idea.....But I bet it will be a good time.